These are the facts of the case and they are undisputed: Sometimes we humans can’t spend four hours making dinner. In fact, sometimes we humans can’t spend two hours making dinner. Along those lines, sometimes we humans can’t spend one hour making dinner.
Especially if we humans have a houseful of kids and dogs, soccer practice (yes, it has already begun), football meetings (yes, they have already begun), and a million and four things going on.
Last night was one of those nights. So I made French Bread Pizzas!
And all the problems of the world were solved.
The thing about these French Bread Pizzas is…I didn’t even use French bread! I used these good ol’ deli rolls, because that’s what I have available in my smalltown grocery store, Maynard. If you can find small baguettes or crusty sandwich rolls, those would be good.
And I’m sorry I called you Maynard.
Then I just grabbed a whole bunch of stuff from my fridge and pantry! Some I wound up not using, other things (not pictured) I brought in at the last minute. Variety is the spice of life with these babies.
The first thing I got started were some caramelized onions: I violently threw some butter in a skillet over medium heat…
Caramelized onions are my love language.
You can use Italian sausage if you want to be cool.
But you can use this breakfast sausage stuff if you want to be like me.
Go ahead and brown the stuff, but if you really, really want to be like me, don’t take a photo of the browned sausage in the pan, okay? Because that would be way too linear and logical and my brain doesn’t work that way.
Once you’ve got all your toppings together, grate up a whole bunch of mozzarella cheese. You can use the good, fresh stuff if you have it…or just the stuff in the supermarket.
Split the rolls in half and lay them all on a baking sheet…then grab the pizza sauce, which is nothing more than jarred marinara, man.
Divine!
It’s a world gone mad.
Here, I did a four-cheese version. Only I didn’t use four cheeses. I used two. Which I guess makes it a two-cheese version. But I’ve never heard of a two-cheese pizza. So I guess what I made here was a cheese pizza. But I’m still going to call it a four-cheese pizza. Cool with you?
Thank you for indulging me.
Four Cheese, which is actually Two Cheese, which is actually Cheese, which I’m actually going to call Four Cheese anyway. And here, because I had no parsley in my garden (it’s really inconvenient) I chopped up some basil and threw it on, which is going to turn black as soon as it hits the oven, but I tried…
And there you go! A nice colorful assortment. Now just throw ‘em in the oven! I put them on the lowest rack in a 375 degree oven at first, because I wanted to give the bread a chance to get a little crisp without cooking the toppings too much. After about 8-10 minutes, I cranked up the heat and moved them to the top rack for a couple of minutes.
(I threw some basil leaves over the Four Cheese Two Cheese Cheese Four Cheese version after it came out of the oven to cover up the black flecks. Always have whole basil leaves around; they cover a multitude of sins.)
I probably could have gone a little longer to get the cheese a little more brown…but I was hungry, man.
I live anywhere caramelized onions reside. They are not only my love language, they’re also my life, my purpose, and my heart.
Enjoy these, guys! Nothing simpler in the world, and they’re perfect for a slumber party, football gathering, or just any weeknight when you don’t have a ton of time.
Here’s the handy dandy printable.
Recipe
French Bread Pizzas
- Prep Time:
- Cook Time:
- Difficulty:
- Easy
- Servings:
- 12
Ingredients
- 6 whole Deli Rolls Or Crusty Italian Rolls
- Jarred Marinara Sauce Or Pizza Sauce
- Jarred Or Refrigerated Pesto
- 2 pounds Mozzarella Cheese, Grated
- Grated Parmesan Cheese To Taste
- 2 Tablespoons Butter
- 1 whole Onion, Sliced
- 1/2 pound Sausage (regular Breakfast Sausage Or Italian Sausage)
- Pepperoni Slices
- Canadian Bacon Slices
- Pineapple Chunks, Fresh Or Canned
- Roma Tomatoes, Sliced
- Sliced Black Olives
- Optional Ingredients: Goat Cheese, Sliced Bell Peppers, Various Cheeses, Pepperoncinis, Jalapeno Slices, Diced Red Onion, Any Other Pizza Topping You'd Like!
Preparation Instructions
Preheat the oven to 375 degrees.
Slice rolls in half and lay them, cut side up, on a large baking sheet.
Top each half with a generous portion of either marinara or pesto. Next, top with a generous amount of grated mozzarella and Parmesan, if you'd like.
Add whatever toppings you'd like on top of the cheese!
Once all assembled, put the pan in the oven on the lowest rack for 8 to 10 minutes. Crank up the heat to 425 and put it on the highest rack until the cheese starts to bubble a bit and turn golden.
Remove and serve immediately! You can cut the pizzas in half right across the middle so there are mini-French Bread Pizzas for everyone.